More on Sharing Life Story about Dealing with Depression

Once more, in writing my morning pages, I hit on something that drives me to turn to the computer to write what I’d like to share.

I was writing about sharing my depression stories. I know, many people don’t want to hear it. Some people can’t handle listening to these types of issues. Some don’t want to know a friend or family member is having problems. Some believe it’s up to the person to handle it by herself or get professional help.

I’ve heard all the usual comments – all along the lines of “Let it go, get over it.” “Grow a pair…” (Well, I’m not usually told that one, but I’ve heard it said a lot.) The ones I keep telling myself are: “Put your boots on and get to work,” and “Pull up your big girl panties and get to work!”

Whenever I hear those types of comments, it tells me the one I’ve talked to doesn’t want to hear it. It doesn’t mean they don’t care about me. It just means what I happen to talk about isn’t a topic in their wheelhouse. And, I also know, one person’s sadness can easily bring another person down. So, in reality, there are few people to be totally open with. (And with my writing, people can choose to read… or not.)

I don’t expect anyone to solve my problems (unless someday I could come up with a personal assistant to handle things I don’t want to, ha-ha.) I don’t expect anyone to do anything for me (except maybe to just say, “I hear you. I understand.”) I just need to speak and write. That’s my way of getting frustration out of me.

What I realized today, is that by my speaking of my anguish, it’s almost like I’m tossing the issues out of me. I’m cleaning my inner well, so to speak. It’s not to put burden on anyone. It’s getting it out of me!

Yes, I talk to Great Spirit, God, Divine Presence, Mum, whatever good spirit might listen, which is good, but there’s something about telling another human being that takes it to another level. Maybe it’s because, as humans, we all go through crap. Some handle it better. Others struggle.

I also believe this is something along the lines of being witnessed. In the telling, it’s like I’m not so all alone in dealing with issues – even though the bottom line is I am the only one who can solve my problems, and I know that. However, just knowing some other person has heard me, makes me feel better. It’s like letting a breath of fresh air inside me… I can even feel Light in my inner soul.

It’s also important to remember balance. For every supposedly bad or sad thing, there is something to feel joy about – even if it’s just the snow’s melting or the sun is shining today or Tuli is being lovable.