Committing and Focusing

Friday morning leaves still remaining on the trees were being ripped off in the fierce wind. Some piled in a thick layer covering the deck. Cardinals, chickadees, nuthatches, and titmice scratched through the accumulation to pick through the couple handfuls of seed I tossed out.

The lights occasionally blinked off and on during the day as I worked on this week’s newspaper edition. Acorns smacked hard on roof and deck making me jump every time and scattering the birds. Branches plopped down and scratched at the side of the house. Eerie shadows reflected in the sunlight through a window in ghostly images dancing against an inside wall.

I have so much stuff to write about ... but to write, I need to allow enough time for the thinking. I get a little spark, an idea, a sentence or paragraph. My attention keeps getting interrupted, and unless I keep working, the spark dies and turns into a cold ember. Hmmm, this is something to think about.

The butterfly bounce (what I call jumping from project to project before finishing previous ones) doesn't allow time needed to nurture the flames of creativity. Butterfly bounce fires tend to be chaotic flash fires which quickly burn out when my attention is grabbed by a different project idea leaving me feeling unfinished, like there's a hole in me.

My favorite poet, David Whyte, once said, “The world will pay attention to you, if you pay attention to it.”

I feel that way about creativity; whether I am writing a poem, doing a pastel painting or working on a book, photographs, or gardening. Paying attention to the project at hand becomes a two-way street. Focus narrows and, even though I can be excited about what I’m doing, that concentration opens a connection.

Divine Presence comes during these moments as whatever I’m working on pays attention back to me. The excitement mingles with a sense of peace and love inviting unseen help (angels, muses, etc.) Words and ideas flow, and I am filled with joy.

So, what does this mean?

Distractions and bouncing from project to project is hectic. If I'm continually scattered with a myriad of things going on all at once, that doesn't allow me to be quiet and get the help from The Divine. I get frustrated with too much going on. My stress level rises which allows self-doubt and negativity to creep in.

The lesson: If I let myself calm down and ask for help to get through it all, magic happens (at least it’s magic to me.) Here’s some of what I’m doing to slow my mind and stop the hectic butterfly bounce:

This revelation has me revamping my studio to not allow myself to get caught up in too many projects at the same time. (I had four easels set up with four different paintings in various stages.)

I’m taking the time to relax and let my mind calm down. (When my mind explodes with multiple ideas, I’ll take a couple notes and let others go.)

I’m putting some projects on hold – I don’t have to do everything now … and I’m not going to let myself feel guilty about it.

I’m not allowing myself to keep thinking about what I’m not getting done and focusing only on the now. Already I feel less stress.

I’m going to calmly focus on the projects I choose to work on and commit to finishing them before starting more.

I make these decisions to help me in my quest to live wholeheartedly doing the best I can with joy and love.